Take Me With You:..:..:.W/DEmo   Matthews & Hoeve /Productions/Lyrics by Shirley E.Matthews/CoWritttenJohnny Hoeve

JD Stenzel - 02 April 2010 11:01 PM

What’s the matter; did I huwt yo feewings? Grow a skin, and some balls—at least enough to post your name, so I can go check your tripe list. I’m positive I’ll find tripe wherever you’ve posted your material, because you defend weak writing, meaning…you’re into weak writing. Those who are afraid of critiques shouldn’t post in public. just go off in the corner and belly-bump yourselves into thinking your songs are fabulous—what the hell ever. “Loser” wasn’t name-calling; it was exactly accurate. You lose when you turn your noses up to good advice. It’s all good; I won’t offer a word to you in the future, and that will be that. Good luck to you. The operative word being…LUCK.

JD

You’re still afraid to post this for critiques at JPF I see lol. If you did, you’d see that most writers there would back up my critique of this piece.

Here’s my tripe list, JD.  It’s at http://www.soundclick.com/mikepilling which you easily could have seen by clicking my profile.  BTW, it’s impossible for you to hurt my feelings, since I don’t know you, except to see that here on SW101 you come across as a bully.

I did listen to your 6 songs on soundclick and enjoyed them, for the most part.

Cheers, Mike Pilling <= real name

S-Bone

Attack the author? I started out giving a straightforward critique. It turned ugly when the author and a few such as yourself started copping an attitude in her defense. So be it. You still haven’t offered one example where I took criticism negatively, so…OBVIOUSLY you’re talking out of your ###…again. You’re just a kid, true, but I thought you were smarter than that. See—I can admit I was wrong.

Shirl-
I used to care for you as a friend. You’re acting like you don’t care about friendships, so…you and I are no longer friends, since that’s aparently how you want it. No prob.

Strat

Fair enough; we see it all the same way. I’ll get around to listening to your material after I visit in Clarksville, or whenever. Don’t judge me; you don’t have the first clue about me personally, and I’ll extend to you the same courtesy.

JD

JD Stenzel - 03 April 2010 02:30 PM

Strat

Fair enough; we see it all the same way. I’ll get around to listening to your material after I visit in Clarksville, or whenever. Don’t judge me; you don’t have the first clue about me personally, and I’ll extend to you the same courtesy.

JD

Works for me.

JPF is a great site.. Lots of really good musicians and songwriters there. The crits are fair and honest IMO. If you want HONEST go to muse…

http://www.musesmuse.com/forums/index.php?showforum=39

Those guys are brutal. I never get a good review over there

In my opinion.. SW101 is too soft. Everyone says GOOD JOB. Fact is, every song could use a tweek or 2 but you really don’t get much good advice here. JMOHO

Is it safe to comment…lol, I liked and enjoyed listening to it,

Tony.

Same question here: Is it safe to comment AND say something that COULD sound negative.

The words of the lyrics are good but on the other hand, the structure itself is really odd. In my eyes and uncreative mind it´s some kind of chaos (don´t take it personel Shirly) so a great kudos that Johnny could make a Song out of this.

I still think that it would be easier for musicians and writers if you - Shirly - would use any kind of structure but OK this is your way of writing. And you found some guys like Johnny who can make songs out of this. I could not do this *lol* maybe it´s a lack of creativity :)

So keep on writing. The demo itself sounds cool.

Shirl,

I would like to hear this done by Michael Buble’ or Richard Cheese with a swing/jazzy feel to it. I would probably change up a couple of parts if it were me to fit the marketability segment but it’s your tune and Johnny didn’t do too bad of a job. The lead guitar/MIDI intro seemed a bit short to me and he was kind of mumbling some of the words but I’m glad that I had the lyrics to read. He said that he wasn’t too good with English anyway and that is totally understandable.

That being said, everyone has their own individual style of writing and like I mentioned earlier…I would love to hear this in a swing/jazzy style musically…In my opinion, the song would be a bit sexier if you did it that way because by the way it is written metaphorically, it seems that is what you are trying to accomplish with all of the imagery in the lyrics. That is a great thing but the song would have more of a strong, attention grabbing appeal to it if it fit the music a little better. I’m not really hearing that particular style of music that Johnny has whenever I read the lyrics…no offense to you or Johnny. This is the first time that I’ve ever listened to him so I don’t know what he is capable of doing. Take care Shirl!! Thanks for the prayers!!

God bless,

-LeeAndrew

J.D.,

Telling me I’m talking out of my ### is one example. 

IHS,

S-bone

@  Tom…:)..lol.lol…Ja.Ja.. Tom!! thanx for the break dude..I needed to change my trend of thoughts..:)

No,,Tom..I wasn;t talking about drugs..in This Piece..but if that’s your interpretation of what’’ Purple
crystals are,,it;s a good thing because it lets’ me know That this Piece can be perceive ‘‘so many ways..
singing about about ‘‘or doing drugs don’t necessarily take away from how coherent this song is…..
If you can keep in mind ;;that this piece is’’ about Affairs of the heart….with a lot of chaos…..
and ‘‘conflicting thoughts. In reference to The title hook’‘Take Me With You’‘...Tom there;s no set
destination,,I will also leave this up to the interpretation of the audience..:)..I feel that This particular
Piece could be more effective this way..:)

Thanx for stopping by Tom:).. it;s always good to see ya..
Shirl;o

‘’.....@ Tony ..:).. Hell;o Tony..yes it;s say to comment..It;s good to see ya..Tony..
I hope your doing okay on your ‘‘side of the pond.’‘’:)..Thanx for Whoa..for feelin
what I’m about when I write..I’m always gonna be a rebel’‘'by nature..
but ,,,the flip side of me is a sweet soul..’‘I would like to continue..’‘to reflect that
to the world..:)

See you in a few;o
Shirl;o

@ Martin..Hell;o Dude!!...It’s always good to see ‘‘you Martin..
Martin what I admire about you the most as a human being is
that’‘you always try to mindful of others feelins..and if you don;t
understand something you always..ask…Thanx..that means
a lot to me Martin…Martin this song is a trip..and I knew it would be
while I was writing this Piece’’ I like to induce ;;different responses
from people..I’m not a fragile doll..I can take what you throw at
me.I don;t want no one here to appease me..period…
Yes..I found someone Who can see beyond the thunderdome..
Johnny said it best..;;he basically chooses Lyrics that inspire
him…. Thanx Martin for Encouraging me to continue to write..:)

See you in a few;o
Shir;l;o

Hell;o Mike..thanx for stopping..I would like to use one of your quotes
to ;;express’‘exactly what My intentions were When I was writing..
this Piece..:):)

[Mike’s Quote]
Actually, for me the song works really well.  I like the feel of it, almost a Joe Jackson sound.  Lyrically, I have no problem with the “timeline”, since there really isn’t one, and one is not even required for a song like this.  The writer is simply expressing thoughts and imagining times together with the other person.

Whoa..The writer is simply expressing thoughts and imagining times together with the other person. [quote from Mike]
thank you Mike you hit it right on the nail….but like I have mention..earlier’‘This Piece is always
open to interpretation of the audience..

**** Mike I have a few ideas I would like to run by you..
about this particular song That was written by me….
I’m convinced that it will strike your fancy…:)
I will holler back at you…::)

if you could leave your email..
I would like to send you the Lyric..
and yes,,you can tell me if you
are not feelin..:)

SEe you in a few;o
Shirl;o

‘’..;; Whoa Lee..dude it;s good to see ya..:).you have an interesting take about this Piece…:)

I like the way your mind pops..hmmmmmmmm..you def. have given me some thoughts to ponder..
‘‘A Swing jazzy /style..very interesting..Lee You made a good valid point….hmmmmmmmmmm
I;m not too fond of the fact that this particular song ;;was your first impression of Johnny
as a ‘‘Producer/Musician/writer/...so I ‘m gonna plug’‘our Reverbnation player.. Johnny and I have about
10 or eleven songs ‘‘Written by us.. so you will have a plenty of music to choose from..:)

When Lee came marching home again Horray Horray!!
:):)..the song said ‘‘Johnny,,,lol.lol:)

Lee I will always be Praying for you,,son..
Always…..

Shirl;o
take care

******** It;s approaching the wee hours of the morning..James..so I will try to be brief..

Shirl-  [James this is your Quote]

I used to care for you as a friend. You’re acting like you don’t care about friendships, so…you and I are no longer friends, since that’s aparently how you want it. No prob.

Merci.. Merci.. Merci..God will you please guide my fingers while I respond to
this statement..James has brought me…My first response to you James was:
i;m not gonna dignify what you said with an answer.. And I quote..
you,,’‘I used to care for you as a friend…The operative word is’‘used,,’‘
Well you damn straight ...James..you got that part factual…You use
to care about me as a friend..This is too petty ..youre willing to dissolve
a friendship over words exchanged ..about A Lyric that was written by
me??..no…I;m not buying that James..your feelins are deeper than
what youre suggesting here’]’‘private domain]..so you gotta shoot
from the hip..dude..it;s like you never knew me. Do you know how
that makes me feel James…..

Shirl;o

And.. Please don;t bring no one else into the mix..Please speak directly..to me..

I don;t wanna hear about..your REasons Why…you dig,,just tell me point blank..
Shirl;oI don;t wanna be friends anyone..James And I will have no choice but to
bow out gracefully,,

Shirl;o

@ Lee :.. This site only has 9 of the songs
written by Johnny Hoeve and I….

http://www.reverbnation.com/matthewshoeve

See you in a few;o
Shirl;o