Crazy World

Sep 06, 2010, 06:26 PM

I already have some feedback about this demo and
would love to hear more that to discuss then with co-workers:

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=9607131

Music:        Aleksandr Saltovskiy (Kharkov Ukraine)
Lyrics:        Colin Skinner (Glasgow, Scotland)
Performance: Annelise ( Colin’s wife)

Title:  Crazy world

0.19
Life’s just one monopoly
But boardroom banking doesn’t fill my needs
Don’t you bank on my account
I can’t be bought for that amount

0.34
This is just a crazy world
Sometimes insanity can feel so good
Don’t you give your heart or your soul
Or you’ll be bought before you even know that you’ve been sold

0.50
They’re diggin’ gold but not for me,
Can’t you see?
That they’ll be diggin’ dirt for someone else if it just gets them what they need

1.08
Cashin’ in, n checkin’ out
Sometimes I wonder what it’s all about
When you’re withdrawn to be gone
Your heart, not money carries on

1.24
This is just a crazy world
Sometimes insanity can feel so good
Don’t you give your heart or your soul
Or you’ll be bought before you even know that you’ve been sold

1.42
They’re diggin’ gold but not for me,
Can’t you see?
That they’ll be diggin’ dirt for someone else if it just gets them what they need

2.25
Watch fraternity falling
When it slides without warning
Watch them leave when it all comes falling down.

Instrumental

2.52
We’re all livin’ in a crazy world x4

©A.Saltovskiy/C. Skinner
January 2010

Sep 06, 2010, 09:57 PM

You have a good chorus but you use it only at the end:

Structure of the song could be:
verse-prechorus-chorus
verse-prechorus-chorus
bridge-instrumental-chorus

verse 1:
Life’s just one monopoly
But boardroom banking doesn’t fill my needs
Don’t you bank on my account
I can’t be bought for that amount

prechorus:
This is just a crazy world
Sometimes insanity can feel so good
Don’t you give your heart or your soul
Or you’ll be bought before you even know that you’ve been sold

—-> Skip the ‘diggin gold’ section and go right to the chorus
with higher notes on “you’ve been sold…”

chorus:
We’re all livin’ in a crazy world
We’re all livin’ in a crazy world
We’re all livin’ in a crazy world
We’re all livin’ in a crazy world

verse 2, prechorus, chorus

bridge:
Watch fraternity falling
When it slides without warning
Watch them leave when it all comes falling down.

instrumental, chorus (chorus might be repeated)
- - -

These are only suggestions.
This is your song and you do what you want with it.

Have fun!

Sep 07, 2010, 12:50 PM

Hi Guy, thanks for your time, I’ll collect all feedback and then we with lyricist will consider possible re-writing

Sep 07, 2010, 03:12 PM

Hi Alek,

you are from Ukrain, cool, I know many people from Ukrain, I speak a bit Russian :) (but no Ukrain)

The melody overall is good, the singer is way too loud. To change this should not be too hard.

Guy is right, you should repeat the chorus. When you don´t repeat it, the chorus is a bridge more or less. You should give the listener something to hold on and to remember :).

So you should play around with the song and repost it, will you? :)

Sep 07, 2010, 03:38 PM

Hi Martin, well I will keep it in my mind, but, other hand, after I posted that song US band begins to learn it and maybe to perform,
so, I’m waiting for feedback from them too and if they accept it as it is, well, then maybe I repost it in their version.
Any way thanks for feedback.

Sep 07, 2010, 09:18 PM

Alek, the singer-character in the story just seems to be philosophizing. I think it would be better if she was talking about a relationship she was in. If it’s too abstract people may not relate to the singer-character’s situation. Here are some suggestions to get the singer-character more involved in the song and in conflict with the mercenary boyfriend.

Music:      Aleksandr Saltovskiy (Kharkov Ukraine)
Lyrics:      Colin Skinner (Glasgow, Scotland)
Performance: Annelise ( Colin’s wife)

Title:  Crazy world

0.19
Life’s just one monopoly
YOUR boardroom banking doesn’t fill my needs
Don’t you bank on my account
I can’t be bought for that amount

0.34
This is just a crazy world
I KNOW insanity can feel so good
I WON’T SELL MY heart or MY soul
I CAN’T be bought AND I WON’T BE sold

0.50
YOU’re diggin’ gold but not for me,
Can’t you see?
That YOU’ll be diggin’ dirt for YOURSELF if it just gets YOU what YOU need
IN YOUR CRAZY WORLD.

1.08
Cashin’ in, n checkin’ out
Sometimes I wonder what YOU’RE all about
When you’re withdrawn, THEN YOU’RE gone
Your heart, not money carries on

1.24
This is just a crazy world
I KNOW insanity can feel so good
I WON’T SELL MY heart or MY soul
I CAN’T be bought AND I WON’T BE sold

1.42
YOU’re diggin’ gold but not for me,
Can’t you see?
That YOU’ll be diggin’ dirt for YOURSELF if it just gets YOU what YOU need
IN YOUR CRAZY WORLD.

2.25
Watch OUR LOVE falling
It SLIPS AWAY without warning
Watch ME leave when it all comes falling down.

Instrumental

2.52
We’re all livin’ in a crazy world x4

©A.Saltovskiy/C. Skinner
January 2010

Sep 08, 2010, 02:19 PM

Gary, thanks for your participation in discussion, you always write exactly to the point!  Should add that I try don’t miss any of your posts here and there(jpfolks) too.
Well, about this demo: singer is great but this is not her song but one for front man like
Kris Doughtry with a heavy sound of a band.
Next: title and idea of a song are of mine, crisis and everything related with it was an inspiration to write it.