Make It Back Home…....

1 of 2
1
       
 
Mar 14, 2017, 07:08 AM

Work in progress…... I’m imagining this as a duet so it needs an opposing verse from a womans’
perspective :)  Typical 3/4 country…

oh here comes trouble
she smells just like peaches and passion
sigarettes and beer
she smiles like an angel
but sounds like a hell bound trainwreck
screaming in my ear
she’s standing too close
and I can’t take my eyes off what her blouse
won’t cover up
she touches my hand
looks up and says let’s go get a bottle
and try to change our luck

oh no, please not again
the last one nearly killed me I swear
low lights, loud music and friends
drowning in bourbon and beer
help me, I’m losing direction
trouble wherever I roam
save me, I’m just a man
trying to make it back home…..

 
     
PIGSWAPWHAFTCA Joined Aug 27, 2016
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

PIGSWAPWHAFTCA Joined Aug 27, 2016
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 15, 2017, 09:54 AM

‘Help me I’m losing direction’ great line, Waylon Jennings came to mind for some reason. Enjoyed this!

 
     
David Swinson Joined Feb 28, 2017
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 15, 2017, 02:34 PM

Cool tune. Put a little harmonica in the background.

 
     
Avatar
marshall williams 1 Joined Mar 27, 2006
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 16, 2017, 11:27 AM

I think this could be great, Tony. Are you going to finish it and produce it properly?

 
     
Avatar
Gavin Sinclair Joined Dec 02, 2014
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 17, 2017, 01:02 AM

Hopefully the duet thing will work out, but yea that’s always my intent lol :)
I’ve been hanging out at a nearby bar/open-mic lately mingling with the local talent, so this is one of
those situations where the first verse just sort of wrote itself lol. I’m wide open to ideas! :)

[ Edited: 17 March 2017 01:05 AM by PIGSWAPWHAFTCA]
 
     
PIGSWAPWHAFTCA Joined Aug 27, 2016
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 17, 2017, 04:43 AM

Hey Tony. Great song.

I’m not sure if you’re looking for a woman’s perspective from a cyber-woman like me or a real one at an open mic, but here’s what I got…

Lord here comes trouble
He wears muscles like armor I fear
Oh, he’s a charmer
His grin lights a fire
My my, but why has it got, so hot in here!?
But oh, things get steamy
I wanna get him near me, but can’t seem
to find my way clear
I reach for his hand
But I’m not too sure what I’ve said
As we walk to the street   :)

Jen

https://soundcloud.com/jennystokes-nz
http://www.evansandstokes.com
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQCYB0H83cE0nC7qpe_lbXA

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain”
- Bob Marley

 
     
Jenny Stokes Joined Sep 24, 2015
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 17, 2017, 06:17 AM

Hmmm….... good one Jenn. But I was thinking it would be funnier if from her perspective “HE” was
just as much trouble!! Perhaps I shouldn’t have bought her that first drink to begin with…....
It’s always “HIS” fault right? Maybe she didn’t even realize she lost a button on her blouse :)
Kick it around guys! Thanks :)

[ Edited: 17 March 2017 06:41 AM by PIGSWAPWHAFTCA]
 
     
PIGSWAPWHAFTCA Joined Aug 27, 2016
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 18, 2017, 12:03 AM

Hmmm. Kind of like, “hey buddy, my face is up here!”

https://soundcloud.com/jennystokes-nz
http://www.evansandstokes.com
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQCYB0H83cE0nC7qpe_lbXA

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain”
- Bob Marley

 
     
Jenny Stokes Joined Sep 24, 2015
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 18, 2017, 02:27 AM

Ha! Exactly! Let’s face it, it always takes two and nobody’s innocent. Maybe the only reason she’s
talking to him is because he’s the only one left standing lol. Perhaps what she really means by “try
changing our luck” is to simply change the circumstances, and of course they both have to make
it back home :)

 
     
PIGSWAPWHAFTCA Joined Aug 27, 2016
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 19, 2017, 03:51 AM

oh, I’m in trouble
I wish he’d stop buying me drinks
and making me dance
he’s tall and he’s funny
but moves like he got two racoons
stuffed in his pants
I’m watching his eyes
the music’s too loud and he’s fixed
on what’s in my shirt
I hope he can hear
told him I’ve got work tomorrow
but he’s such a flirt

oh no, please not again
the last one nearly killed me I swear
low lights, loud music and friends
drowning in bourbon and beer
help me, I’m losing direction
trouble wherever I roam
save me, I’m just a girl
trying to make it back home :)

 
     
PIGSWAPWHAFTCA Joined Aug 27, 2016
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 19, 2017, 04:08 AM

buying me beer
...
his eyes start to wander

:)

https://soundcloud.com/jennystokes-nz
http://www.evansandstokes.com
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQCYB0H83cE0nC7qpe_lbXA

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain”
- Bob Marley

 
     
Jenny Stokes Joined Sep 24, 2015
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 19, 2017, 04:17 AM

Ha! Yea, that works :)
Now if we could wrap this up with a little back-n-forth line for line that would be awesome….
especially if they go ahead and leave together :)

 
     
PIGSWAPWHAFTCA Joined Aug 27, 2016
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 19, 2017, 05:41 AM

He: Hey baby
She: Don’t call me baby
He: You like the way I call you baby, don’t-cha
She: No, really I don’t.
She: Look, I’ve gotta leave.
He: Your place or mine?
She: Ohh boy!
He: You know I’ve got this guitar…
She: Mmmm, I do LOVE a guitar…
She: So what do you like for breakfast…?

lol
:)

https://soundcloud.com/jennystokes-nz
http://www.evansandstokes.com
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQCYB0H83cE0nC7qpe_lbXA

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain”
- Bob Marley

 
     
Jenny Stokes Joined Sep 24, 2015
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 19, 2017, 06:42 AM

he: hey baby…..
she: I’ve got my own place and pay taxes so
don’t call me baby
he: oh I’m sorry beautiful
but the way you’ve been movin’ n shakin’ has
been drivin’ me crazy….

[ Edited: 19 March 2017 06:53 AM by PIGSWAPWHAFTCA]
 
     
PIGSWAPWHAFTCA Joined Aug 27, 2016
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

 
Mar 20, 2017, 06:19 AM

she: ?

 
     
PIGSWAPWHAFTCA Joined Aug 27, 2016
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank
  • Rank

Send PM

1 of 2
1