My first show is in 8 days!! Agghh!

 
       
 
Aug 02, 2017, 10:41 PM

Written lots of originals, but these are the two new ones that my band will be playing at our first show next Friday! Really nervous but also excited—any tips are appreciated!

Enjoy the lyrics! I’ll try to get demos up when we have them, but for now we’re just trying to not embarrass ourselves, lol!

_____________________________________
Holdin’ On (The Cracks)...haven’t picked a name yet really

***Verse 1***
Hold on it’s a long way down
Probably never shoulda stuck around this town (now)
I’m getting shivers every time I think
About the world above my bathroom sink (it makes me shrink)

*Chorus*
But if you’re holding onto something—I hope that something’s holding back
And if you’re floatin into nothin—I hope you float up through the cracks

***Verse 2***
Hold fast—and play pretend
The monster’s all around you wanna be your friend (but you won’t let them)
You’re sick and tired of the watching from the window sill
And the cabinet that’s full of all the purple pills
But you won’t take them (you won’t take them)

*Chorus*
But if you’re holding onto something—I hope that something’s holding back
And if you’re floatin into nothin—I hope you float up through the cracks

_____________________________

Crazy B*tch

*Intro*
Don’t you smoke your cigarettes in my house
And disrespect
You can pound your fist
Or shake your hips
You’re still a crazy, crazy #####
I said

*Interlude*
Youuu Yooouuuu
Youuu Yoooouuu

*Verse*
I completely understand if you got mayhem on your mind
If I’m honest I been feelin kinda angry all the time
Life aint what you thought it be
Thought you’d live like on TV
But you’re more like a disease
Child, please

*Chorus*
It’s weekend now
Are you feelin how
The cocain works and whiskey burns
Your chest
The cocain works and whiskey burns
Your chest

*Interlude*

*Verse*
You’re a mess at your best and you’re never really fine
If you’re honest you been feelin kinda lonely all the time

Life aint what you thought it be
Thought it’d be like magazines
But it’s feeling like curse, whats worse?

*Chorus*

*Bridge*
It’s okay to insane
Every once in a while, in while, in a while
No shame, we’re the same
In the end—after all, after all, after all

[ Edited: 02 August 2017 11:04 PM by Ethan Murrell]
 
     
Ethan Murrell Joined Feb 17, 2017
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Aug 03, 2017, 01:29 AM

If you have a good time when you play odds are anyone listening will too. Relax the jitters and enjoy the show.

The Lyric stories are kind of odd so I’m not sure how listeners will ‘get’ the story. They may be fine. Hearing them sung could make a major difference in how they’re perceived.

I often recommend deleting ‘And’ and ‘But’ in the beginning of lines. Your Chorus on “Cracks” is a good example. Delete those words and, to me, the lines read the same. Writers use the ‘connector’ words to tie ideas together, but listeners get the connection without those connector words. Taking those words out of the singer’s mouth makes it easier, I think, to sing the line.

‘And’ is particularly egregious, in that singers omit the ‘A’ sound, leaving ‘nd’ to slur into the next word, maybe obscuring what that word is, confusing listeners on what the whole line is.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? http://www.garyeandrews.com

 
     
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Gary E. Andrews Joined Apr 12, 2005
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Aug 03, 2017, 03:07 AM

Thanks for the feedback! I’ve been challenging myself to try my hand at more abstract lyrics. I used to always tell very specific stories—now I’m giving myself a license to be a little bit more ‘out there’. I could take out but and and, but I need a single syllable that’s below ‘if’. So there aren’t a whole lot of options for one syllable words that can go there and make sense. I may change it as I play it and think on it more though.

 
     
Ethan Murrell Joined Feb 17, 2017
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Aug 03, 2017, 04:38 AM

First gig! Wow! So very cool. Here’s some weird advice. Clench your butt cheeks a couple times before going out on stage if you’re nervous. It sounds strange but it helps release tension. Have a good laugh. That’s a release too (especially if you’re the singer). Some folks have a wee drink (as in tipple), but I don’t cause I find it makes me nervous and shaky. Same applies with caffeine. That’s also a no go for me too, but, weirdly, a weak tea is a good thing. It’s gotta be weak though or I get the jitters.

A good breathing exercise is magic. Try in through your nose for four, out for four (also your nose), then when you’ve got that steadied, start increasing the count…5, then 6. Don’t go too high though or you’ll get light headed and fall over (the last thing you need). The trick is to focus on breathing steady. There’s something calming about that. Sounds guru, but not really, cause you’re not twisted into a pretzel while doing it are ya.

Know your stuff. It’s hard to be nervous when you know your stuff. My first audience was about 300 people. I practiced so hard in the lead up to that day that when I got up there, I was stunned to find out that I wasn’t nervous at all. I totally expected to be nervous because I had nightmares about college oral presentations where I was dry mouthed and shaking like a leaf…ends up I know songs better than operations management (yawn).  lol

Like Gary says, have fun. You’re doing it cause you love it. If you know your stuff, that passion for music will win over nerves easy.

https://soundcloud.com/jennystokes-nz
http://www.evansandstokes.com

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain”
- Bob Marley

 
     
Jenny Stokes Joined Sep 24, 2015
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Aug 03, 2017, 05:09 AM

Great advice; thanks Jenny!

We’ve only been practicing together for about 3-4 weeks, but I somehow lucked out and found a guitarist, bassist, and drummer that have a combined 24 years playing their instruments (drummer is 24, I’m 21 and guitarist and bassist are 19…). And I’ve only played for 8 months LOL.

I think I’m the only one who hasn’t played a gig before, and I’m the front man lol. I know I’ll enjoy it and we’ll do fine as long as I don’t get in my own head. I used to get that way before with speeches—where my throat gets all tight and my voice would sound shaky. It doesn’t happen often anymore, but it’d be pretty sweet if that DIDN’T happen when we play—because I imagine that would make it pretty hard to sing lol.

To be honest, I love writing and the creative part of the process, but performing or speaking or doing anything in front of people is probably my biggest fear. I kinda got to this point where I realized that’s probably the exact reason why I SHOULD do it—like, the things you are scared the most to fail are the things you probably want the most, I guess? And who wants to be someone who let’s themselves be controlled by their fears?

The weirdest part is that I don’t even know what I get so worked up about. I definitely wouldn’t consider myself a person who cares too much about what people think but, for some reason, the more I think about being up in front of people the more anxious I get. I feel like it’s probably just a thing where I’ve been telling myself I could never do it for so long, but when I do it and the sky doesn’t fall then I’ll be like “Oh.”

 
     
Ethan Murrell Joined Feb 17, 2017
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Aug 03, 2017, 05:26 AM

I hear ya. The sky definitely doesn’t fall when you face your fears or it ends up that you’re not perfect. It’s the exact opposite. That moment when you go, “Oh. That wasn’t so bad” is pretty liberating. I gotta say I was totally surprised that I wasn’t nervous when it came time to perform. Beforehand…totally a wreck, but then when I stood up there sharing the thing I love, I was “sweet, this is a pretty neat deal.”

I just thought of another useful thing first-time out the gate…if you have any song in your set that you get vocal support from someone else in your band, put that song first. It’s definitely easier to sing first time if you’re accompanied by someone else. If not, then put a song that you love to sing first up. Once the first one is sung, the rest are easy so make the first one as no-brainer as poss.

https://soundcloud.com/jennystokes-nz
http://www.evansandstokes.com

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain”
- Bob Marley

 
     
Jenny Stokes Joined Sep 24, 2015
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Aug 03, 2017, 05:33 AM

Here’s an opener for your first song. Grab the mic, walk right out to the edge of the stage and pause
a moment while you look out across the audience. Wait for them to wonder what you’re doing and
quiet down just a bit, then say….... “What are all you people doing in my bathroom?” :)

I certainly hope these are rock lyrics! I love “the world above my bathroom sink”. Just have one
suggestion for your chorus….

But if you’re holding onto something—I hope that something doesn’t crack
And if you’re floatin into nothin—I hope I’m here when you get back

BREAK-A-LEG :)

 
     
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JAPOV Joined Jul 02, 2006
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Aug 03, 2017, 06:42 AM

Cool!

Good luck and have lots of fun!

Bernd
good lyricist, mediocre songwriter, lousy musician;
likes rock, writes for anybody anyway
http://bernd-harmsen.com

 
     
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Bernd Harmsen Joined May 31, 2009
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Aug 03, 2017, 01:47 PM

Good luck, Ethan. And I like both lyrics. They have a visual quality and suggest a story/situation enough for the listener to fill in the blanks. That’s a lot different from being annoyingly abstract and obscure.

 
     
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Gavin Sinclair Joined Dec 02, 2014
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Aug 12, 2017, 09:44 PM

Posted the videos on here, but I figured this wasn’t really the appropriate thread anymore so I put it here:

http://www.songwriter101.com/forums/viewthread/94784/

Thanks a bunch for all the support before hand guys! Especially Jenny, you really helped me calm down on a night I was feeling particularly nervous!

 
     
Ethan Murrell Joined Feb 17, 2017
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Aug 12, 2017, 11:45 PM

My pleasure, Ethan.
Jen

https://soundcloud.com/jennystokes-nz
http://www.evansandstokes.com

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain”
- Bob Marley

 
     
Jenny Stokes Joined Sep 24, 2015
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