A couple of songs if anyone would care to listen/critique

 
       
 
Jan 30, 2018, 04:56 PM

I’m certainly not the world’s greatest singer, I know. Hoping for some feedback more pertaining to structure/lyrical content/chord choice…. basically songwriting :P

https://youtu.be/iVM8Xpzk4Y8
https://youtu.be/H09NvR3qc5k
https://youtu.be/zep-o2D4HJQ
https://youtu.be/ElsqmDR4Hjk
https://youtu.be/esvcRru4fQg

[ Edited: 17 March 2018 01:20 PM by Rhys Fraser]
 
     
Rhys Fraser Joined Jan 30, 2018
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Jan 31, 2018, 01:53 PM

I listened to the first one. I’ll try to listen to the others later.

I liked the lyric and the tune fits it well. There seem to be a few spots where you have to rush the words to fit them in.

Welcome aboard!

 
     
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Gavin Sinclair Joined Dec 02, 2014
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Jan 31, 2018, 01:56 PM

Thanks for listening! Yeah, squeezing lyrics in where they don’t quite fit seems to be an ongoing problem I need to address, but I’m glad you liked the lyrics and tune. Thanks for the warm welcome, happy to be here!

 
     
Rhys Fraser Joined Jan 30, 2018
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Jan 31, 2018, 03:37 PM

I like “Live Life Through A Camera”  :)
You should post some lyrics in the library, many here will help you condense them down
into something more “rhythmic”.  :)

 
     
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JAPOV Joined Jul 02, 2006
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Jan 31, 2018, 04:39 PM

Thanks! Glad ya liked it. Thanks for the advice as well, I’ll definitely do that!

 
     
Rhys Fraser Joined Jan 30, 2018
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Mar 16, 2018, 05:31 PM

I tried, but no videos..

 
     
L. Vincent Joined Sep 30, 2007
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Mar 17, 2018, 12:27 PM

Crap, sorry! In the midst of an anxiety attack I made all those videos private. 😬 Appreciate the effort, of you do feel like checking them out they’re back up now. If not, s’all good! Either way, I appreciate the effort. Cheers!

 
     
Rhys Fraser Joined Jan 30, 2018
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Mar 17, 2018, 01:20 PM

Hey Rhys, just listened to “never trust a smile… good song, well written,
not to long so your not boring people 2:51 to me you write like and this song reminds me of a
singer/songwriter   Paul Thorn. this was a good listen and held my interest, I`m just amateur player, I mostly write, and have a friend that sings and produces for me.  thanks for inviting me back, I`ll have a look at the other songs,  Vincent

 
     
L. Vincent Joined Sep 30, 2007
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Mar 17, 2018, 01:23 PM

Hey, thanks Vincent! Glad you enjoyed it. I’m not familiar with Paul Thorn, but I’ll definiteky give him a listen. Thanks for coming back by the way! A listening ear is always appreciated. Cheers

 
     
Rhys Fraser Joined Jan 30, 2018
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Mar 17, 2018, 03:29 PM

Sorry it took so long getting back…I have 3 daughters and had to hunt down a set of headphones….lol

I like this song too..Big Blue Eyes and City Lights. had to listen pretty hard to hear the lyric, that might just be me I`m old and hard of hearing, half blind,  but the style is a keeper for me.  I`ll come back, enjoyed this.  Vincent

I have so much trouble with video, or slideshows…when to use them and when not. I have this song i`m putting together, and if I just let people hear it, I don`t think they would know what the hell it was about, put a slideshow with it and there is no doubt..

then I have some music people listen to and they tell me, the “show takes them in a different way, if they would have closed their eyes
they would have had a far different idea of the work..so I guess I have to be picky what “shows I put on..

anyway good listen, you have a great day.

[ Edited: 17 March 2018 03:44 PM by L. Vincent]
 
     
L. Vincent Joined Sep 30, 2007
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Mar 17, 2018, 03:34 PM

Haha, no worries and thanks Vincent! Obviously family comes first, but I appreciate you listening. Happy St Paddy’s by the way!

 
     
Rhys Fraser Joined Jan 30, 2018
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Mar 17, 2018, 03:45 PM

yep, one of my fav things to do…listen. have a good day.

 
     
L. Vincent Joined Sep 30, 2007
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Mar 17, 2018, 04:49 PM

I’m fairly drunk tbh, but what did you think about Too Everything, if you heard that one? I wrote it this week, first song I’ve written w/ a capo, which I’ve been told isn’t particularly notable

 
     
Rhys Fraser Joined Jan 30, 2018
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Mar 18, 2018, 02:33 PM

hey Rhys I listened to the song…‘Too Everything, really like your style in those songs, and again its a little hard for me to hear all the lyric.
in this song you come across like “Lifehouse a little harmony and that song would be set I think, just my thoughts. capo is ok if you sing in that pitch, bad if you don`t. I thought this was fine..and again, just my thoughts.  you have a great day.  Vincent

[ Edited: 18 March 2018 03:11 PM by L. Vincent]
 
     
L. Vincent Joined Sep 30, 2007
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Mar 19, 2018, 01:23 PM

Thanks again man! Tbh it might be a bit high for my range, might try it lower. Happy Monday!

 
     
Rhys Fraser Joined Jan 30, 2018
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